B2 First article example, marked
The same article written twice: first an answer that would get about 10 out of 20 (just below a pass), then the same answer improved to about 18 out of 20. Every problem and every improvement is marked and explained, criterion by criterion.
The task
You see this announcement on an English-language website for young people.
Articles wanted! A place that means a lot to me
Tell us about a place that is special to you. Why is it important to you, and what does it show about the kind of person you are?
The best articles will be published on our website.
Write your article.
Write your article in 140–190 words.
Answer 1
about 10 / 20My special place1
In this article I will write about my special place.2 It is the house of my grandmother in a small village near the mountains.
I go there every summer since I was a child.3 The house is old and big and it has a garden with a lot of trees. In the garden there is a swing and I play there with my cousins when we were small.4 My grandmother cooks very good food and we eat outside. She has a dog called Lola and she is very friendly.
The village is very quiet and there is not internet5 in the house, so I read books and walk in the mountains. It is very relaxing.6
In conclusion, it is a very special place for me and I love it.7
132 words
What goes wrong
- A title, but a very plain one: an article needs to catch the reader’s attention.
- An article shouldn’t announce what it is about – it should make the reader want to read on.
- Tense: “I have been going there every summer since I was a child.”
- Tense: “we used to play there when we were small.”
- “there is no internet”.
- True, but simple: what does this tell the reader about the writer?
- The task asks what the place shows about you, and the article never answers it. “In conclusion” also sounds like an essay, not an article.
The marks
The place is described, but the second question – what it shows about the writer – is not answered.
It reads like a list of facts. There is little to interest or involve the reader.
Clear paragraphs, but the ideas are joined mostly with “and”.
Simple language with several errors of tense (I go there since…, I play… when we were).
Answer 2: the same ideas, improved
about 18 / 20The house where I learned to slow down1
Do you have a place where time seems to stop?2 For me, it’s my grandmother’s old stone house in a tiny village at the foot of the mountains.
I’ve been spending my summers there since I was a toddler. As children, my cousins and I used to spend whole afternoons3 on the swing under the walnut tree, and my grandmother would call us in for dinner, which we always ate outside under the stars.
There’s no internet in the house, which horrified me when I was younger. Now, though, it’s exactly what I love about it.4 Without my phone, I read, walk for hours and actually talk to people.
So what does this place say about me?5 Probably that, underneath my busy city life, I’m someone who needs silence and a bit of nature to feel like myself. Everyone should have a place like that – where’s yours?6
156 words
What makes it better
- A title that makes the reader curious.
- A direct question draws the reader in – typical of a good article.
- “Used to” for past habits, used correctly.
- Shows a change in the writer, which keeps the reader interested.
- Answers the second part of the task directly.
- Ends by speaking to the reader again, as articles often do.
The marks
Both parts of the task are covered: why the place matters and what it shows about the writer.
Lively and personal, with questions to the reader – it holds the reader’s attention as an article should.
A clear progression from the place, to memories, to a change, to what it all means.
A good range of tenses (I’ve been spending, used to, would call) and vivid vocabulary.
What made the difference
- Content: A whole paragraph now answers “what does it show about you?”.
- Communicative achievement: An eye-catching title, a question to open and a question to close: it talks to the reader.
- Organisation: Each paragraph moves the story on instead of adding more facts.
- Language: The tense errors are fixed, and the past is told with “used to” and “would”.
An article is written for readers who don’t have to read it. Start with something that makes them want to: a question, a surprising fact or a short scene.
Now write your own
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More examples
The marks are Levoop’s estimate using the four criteria Cambridge uses for Writing (0–5 each). Only Cambridge English can give an official mark. The texts were written for Levoop.